When we mention accepting a person’s disability, we often come from the perspective of a non-disabled person accepting a disabled person’s disability. However, when it comes to disability acceptance, there is the other side to that coin too, the side of a person with a disability accepting their own disability.

As someone who lives with a neuromuscular condition, it has taken me years to fully accept my disability. Particularly the more visual parts, like my ventilator, that aren’t that common – even in the disability world. So if you’re struggling with your disability at the moment (because we’ve all had those moments) or you’re a parent with a child who may be going through a period of resenting their disability, here are three lessons that I’ve learnt when it comes to accepting my disability.

Tip 1: Remembering That Hardly Anyone Loves All Parts Of Their Body

With the glitz and glamour of social media, it’s hard to remember that people’s life doesn’t always look like that, and neither does their body confidence. There will almost definitely be a part of their body that they thought didn’t look “normal” (though honestly, what is a “normal body”?) before posting that photo. Unfortunately for people with disability, our body differences often are just a little more obvious.

So if you’re not accepting all of your body right now, that’s ok, know you're not alone. Start small by focusing on one thing that you like about your body. Maybe you have amazing eyes or nice hair.

Tip 2: Focusing On What Works For You (And Not Caring What Others Think)

The hardest part of my disability for me to accept was my ventilator mask. I felt it made me look “more disabled” (which was very ableist of me but when you’re young you just want to fit in ) and I would actively take it off in some public situations and for Instagram photos. This obviously wasn’t the best for my health, leading to headaches and fatigue.

In reality, wearing it made me feel so much better and I was able to do things because I wasn’t running out of breath. In the beginning it was hard to embrace that side of me and push past wondering what people would think. However, sometimes in life we overthink things and this was definitely the case here. The people around me didn’t even blink an eye. Like Dr Seuss said “those that matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter”.

So while it’s easier said than done, embrace you. If for some reason people do look at you differently because of your disability, remember that any comments they make are a reflection on them, not you, because you’re just living your life!

Tip 3: Everyone Has Challenges In Life And That Make You The Person You Are Today

There is a theory that if everyone put their problems into a bag, they would wish to pick their problems back out because it’s better the devil you know. Knowing this is a good reminder that everyone faces challenges.

When these challenges are weighing particularly heavily on me, I like to remind myself of all of the ways that my disability has shaped my life for the better. Again, this is something that comes with age, but I 100% believe that I wouldn’t be living the life I am without my disability and for everything I can’t do because of it, there are at least two things that make me amazing. It has enabled me to do cool things like be on podcasts, grow an Instagram account (which I now actively use to show off all aspects of my disability and be as a role model for younger people with a disability), meet amazing people, have the confidence to start my own business and move to a new city with a fantastic accessible apartment, just to name a few things.

Don’t just take my word for it though. You can also read more amazing things that The Loop community members have achieved in the Living Life sections on the website.


So, if you’re working towards accepting your disability and saying goodbye to that internal ableism (aka when you think of yourself as less because you’re disabled), I hope these tips help! Plus remember the wise words of Dr Seuss, “today you are you that is truer than true, there is no one alive who is youer than you”!